![]() ![]() She can’t tell how much of what she’s feeling about these things is really down to herself and how much she’s compelled to feel because of Rip’s implanted memories or the personality template installed by the AVA corporation.īefore she rings the doorbell, Ava tries to remember what she’s still sure about, what she still knows about herself. She’s no longer sure about the Worcester sauce, not even about true crime or podcasting. That’s the worst of it – not knowing her own feelings. ![]() Who knows if her aversion is even real and not just a quirk that Rip programmed into her for fun. Now, Ava thinks that her…Pam probably just forgot that Ava hates Worcester sauce – it’s not like Ava was all that important to her, to Pam she was just a job. Did they notice when somebody else showed up from one Christmas to the next? Or did they all have the same mannerisms, the same body language? Did they all talk with the same inflection, using the same words, saying the same things? Did all 12 of them record a new StabCast episode every Sunday? Did they all make a big show of grudgingly trying the Worcester sauce that her mom – no…Pam – insisted on serving with every meal?Īva always thought that she did it to tease Ava, to gently show her that they would always be her parents who would always make it a point to get her to try new things, no matter how old she was. Most of all, she wants to know if they could tell a difference – if AVA 7 was different from AVA 6. She wants to ask them about other things, though – what the ad for the job looked like, how much Rip paid them, if they ever felt bad about lying to her. She vows not to ask them about it – she doesn’t want to know, wants to keep believing at least this. Now, Ava’s not sure if any of it was true, if they’re even married in real life and not just pretending for her benefit, pretending to still be in love after all these years together, so that she feels good about her parents’ happy marriage. It seemed sweet, like they had a happy marriage. Actually, she never felt comfortable using it, and at least that makes sense now.įor just a moment, before she rings the doorbell, she hopes that they aren’t at home, that they’re grocery shopping or at one of the art galleries that they like to visit together or at the country club.Īva always liked that about them – that they had common interests, that they even did the groceries together. She doesn’t feel comfortable using her key anymore. She’s not a former FBI agent, she’s not a Stanford graduate with a master’s degree in policy organization and leadership studies, she’s not unique, not even human maybe, and she’s definitely not their daughter. ![]()
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